When you are considering reaching out to family members, please recognize the emotional complexities involved. This isn’t just about sending a message. It is about those in the group as well.
The family members you’re reaching out to might value their privacy, and it’s important to approach them with sensitivity to their boundaries.
Here’s a quick rundown to guide you through the first part of this process:
- Go into this with an open heart and a flexible mind.
- Stay patient. Rebuilding connections takes time.
- Always respect the other person’s right to engage or not.
- Prepare for any outcome.
- Rejection is a possibility,
- A wonderful new chapter in your family history is also possible.
Be Ready to Contact the Next One on the List.
By setting realistic expectations, you will save yourself a lot of emotional energy. If there have been some issues in your family for years, one invitation from you to a member of the family may not be the answer.
Move on the the next one on the list, maybe they will be ready to start a family communication group with you. In time the ones who were not interested may change their mind.
Understand that relationships develop differently and what happens post-contact can be unpredictable.
With these underlying principles in mind, you’re better equipped for the next step which is preparing for the initial contact.
Often, the family member will have suggestions for a good way to start up. Then again, the ball may always be in your court, so start slowly with a loose schedule. Once a week or month is often a good start.
How to Prepare for the First Contact
Now, that you’ve decided to reach out, and try to build a family communications group, are you wondering how to start?
Social media can be a good starting point if you need addresses or phone numbers.
Now, think about how you’re going to make contact.
An email or a letter can give them time to process.
A phone call can be effective. They can be a good way to start, but usually, phone calls are hard to time properly for busy families.
This might be a way to start, but we have found that calls don’t work as well as using technology. A communication that can be handled at a time of the receiver’s choice is working better for us.
Wording the first message can be overwhelming if you overthink the project.
What you’re aiming for is to be inviting, but not pushy.
Suggestions for the Message to Reach Out
1. “Hi Family, I’ve been thinking about a way for us to stay connected. stay n touch better, Let’s start a family communication group!
Let’s use this platform to share updates, plan gatherings, and keep our bonds strong. Looking forward to catching up with everyone!”
2. “Hey everyone! With our family spread across different cities and states, it’s important to find ways to stay connected. That’s why I’ve created this communication group where we can share stories, exchange advice, and keep each other in the loop. Let’s make the most of this opportunity to strengthen our family ties!”
Would you like to be included?
3. “Hello family! As many of us are busy with life, let’s not forget to communicate and share with one another. I’ve created this group to provide a space for us to communicate, support each other, and share what is happening with you. Will you join in and let us hear from you?
4. “Greetings, family members! In today’s fast-paced world, it’s easy to lose touch with loved ones. That’s why I’ve started this communication group – to create a virtual gathering place where we can share news, reminisce about old times, and strengthen our family bonds. Looking forward to connecting with each of you!
Check us out and see what you think.”
5. Good morning, I’ve started this communication group as a way for us to stay connected and maybe be a little involved in each other’s lives.
Whether it’s sharing updates, seeking advice, or simply catching up, let’s use this platform to support one another and improve our family connections. Can’t wait to reconnect with everyone!”
Of course, none of these messages sound exactly right for your group. However, you are learning and there is always a curve. Besides all that, the ones who may make snide remarks have made no effort to establish a family group, so don’t let it bother you.
OK, Now What?
You’ve sent that first message, and guess what? They’re open to some form of communication!
This brings a mix of emotions, doesn’t it? Excitement, anxiety, maybe even relief.
I can’t stress enough the power of good listening. When they speak, genuinely tune in.
It shows you value their thoughts and feelings. You’re going to learn a lot about them—and about yourself—during this phase. So, don’t rush. Acknowledge what they’re sharing with you, even if it’s different from what you expected.
You might encounter hesitancy. That’s normal. If you do, resist the urge to push.
Instead, express understanding. You can say something like, ‘I realize this might be a lot to take in, and I’m here whenever you’re ready to talk more.’ It demonstrates respect for their comfort zone.
Let’s be real: This is just the starting line. You’re planting seeds for something that might grow over time. Don’t worry too much about covering everything in one go. Your first attempt doesn’t need to be a tell-all marathon, and you can always adjust your approach down the road.
Building a Relationship After the Initial Connection
I would like to share some ideas for the next steps. You’ve taken that brave leap to reach out to build a family communication group.
What’s next, you might ask.
Now, you’ll learn how to encourage this fragile new relationship group you’ve started.
Taking things slowly is crucial. If there are things about your life you don’t choose to share, that is your choice. You shouldn’t hurry this relationship. Let it evolve at a comfortable pace for all of you.
This isn’t just about immediate connections, it’s also about ongoing respect for each other’s lives and boundaries.
You can always adjust your approach down the road, but it’s vital to show respect for the other person’s comfort zone and for the history you both bring to this family communication group.
You May Want to Start With Just One Other Family Member
Then when the time feels right, and if you’re both amenable, consider how involving other family members might further improve your group.
A family gathering might be something to think about, but again, don’t rush. Your first attempt doesn’t need to be a huge family affair.
Family is just that. No one suddenly turned perfect! We all know that sometimes the time is just not right. If this is the case, let the subject rest awhile. In a new season, they may be ready for a family communication group.
I hope that you find fulfillment and joy in your journey of reconnection.
Trust is built with consistency, so be patient and keep showing up. Add a short message to whatever mode of communication you have decided to work with. In time, you may establish a bond that adds to your family’s strength.
Sami’s take on “How to Build Your Family Communication Group”
As family communications are important to our family, and I feel build stronger ties, I hope to be able to encourage you to consider a group for your family.
Now I am thinking a once a once-a-month communications group for our extended family. I appreciate the daily group that includes the kids and grandkids, but think that is too often to get participation from the larger group.
And I don’t want to feel responsible for another group that communicates daily. Consider the ideas presented here, make a plan, and move forward.
Strong family ties can be a benefit for our children as we get older and they are feeling a bit abandoned. Someone just needs to make the first move. Will it be you?
Thank you,
Sami